My complicated life
by KymanFTW
Summary: Mordecai has proposed to Margaret and she said yes, but when asked if he'll be the best man, Rigby's answer was no. And now Mordecai's quit his job Benson has no choice but to hire two more female employees, just to add to the mess of things. Life for everyone proves to be complicated.
1. Chapter 1

It was a warm summer's afternoon, and Mordecai and Rigby were out in the Park's garden, cleaning the fountain.

"You want me to suck the gunge outta the hose today?" Mordecai said suddenly as Rigby reached over to grab it.

"Huh? Seriously? But normally I always do it...or we at least play punchies to see who has to do it." Rigby replied, dumbfounded.

Mordecai shrugged. "Yeah well, today I'm feeling nice, whatever."

Mordecai shuddered as he brought the hose to his beak and quickly sucked up the mildew from inside before violently spitting it out all over the grass.

"UGH!" he groaned, rubbing his tongue.

"Dude sick!" Rigby laughed, leaping back to avoid the spray.

"I know right?" Mordecai spluttered. He turned to Rigby suddenly. "You wanna play punchies anyway?" he asked.

Rigby raised an eyebrow. "Sure...I guess." he sighed.

He stretched out his arm and punched Mordecai's side as hard as he could. It was like a butterfly punching a rhino.

"Ugh, you got me! Aww!" Mordecai cried suddenly, falling to his knees and rolling about the grass clutching his side.

"Huh?" Rigby frowned. "Why did you let me win?"

Mordecai stood up. "What do you mean why did I let you win? I never. You got me. You got me good."

Rigby knew this was a lie. It was weird though, because normally when Mordecai won he'd claim he'd let him win, but now that he really had won, he knew it was only because Mordecai had let him.

"First the hose, and now punchies. Why are you being so nice to me today?" Rigby sighed, turning the hose on and beginning to fill the fountain.

Mordecai gave Rigby a lop-sided grin. "Because. You're ma bro. Ma best bud for life. Am I not allowed to be nice to you?"

"No. Not normally." Rigby muttered, before suddenly lifting the hose up and spraying Mordecai, completely soaking him,

"Aw dude!" Mordecai said, rage falling over his face. But then he looked at Rigby and suddenly put on a huge grin. "Haha, I'm all wet, look at that." he laughed falsely.

Rigby grinned. "You're right, you are pretty wet." his grin spread even wider at how wrong that sounded.

"Yup, sure am..." Mordecai's eyes drifted off somewhat. "Oh, and meandMargaretaregettingmarri ed."

Rigby froze. "What? What did you say?" he spat, eyes wide.

"Oh nothing, nothing, just that meandMargaretaregettingmarri ed." Mordecai said hoarsely. "Phew, is it hot out here or is it just me? I'm going inside for a drink, you want something?" he said casually.

Rigby dropped the hose. It fell to the bottom of the fountain with a thud. His face turned pale. His eyes grew wide. His face was the exact picture of shock.

"You and Maragret...are getting married." he said outloud, not as a question, but as a statement almost to himself. "You and Margaret...are getting-"

"YES! YES OKAY!? Me and Margaret are getting married! I proposed to her last night when she invited me round to hers and she said yes. I was hoping you would be best man." Mordecai managed to choke out.

Rigby stared at his best friend, his only friend, to him, his only family. And he was suddenly violently sick all over the ground.

He ran.


	2. Chapter 2

Mordecai sighed and watched Rigby until he completely disappeared into the distance.

Mordecai hadn't expected Rigby to take the news well, but even this seemed like a bit of an over-reaction, even for Rigby.

Mordecai finished cleaning the fountain allowing, figuring Rigby would probably need some space for a while, but once he was done he began the trek back up to the house.

The door was open so he walked right in. He looked around for Benson or the others but they all seemed to be out.

But as he began up the stairs to his and Rigby's shared room, he heard some muffled talking. He pushed the door open and gasped.

Benson, Pops and Skips were all standing around Rigby's trampoline, Skips and Pops looking upset, Benson looking awkward and slightly angry.

They all turned around to look at Mordecai, and he felt his face burn crimson.

"What have you done to him!?" Benson spat, face red with anger. "He won't say a word to any of us! If he doesn't get up and start working now the both of you are FIRED!" he cried.

"Benson, calm down, Rigby's obviously upset about something, leave the poor guy alone." Skips spoke calmly.

"Yes Benson, if Rigby does not wish to talk to us, perhaps it is best if we allow Mordecai to try and reason with him." Pops spoke sadly, eyes wide with concern.

Benson growled and kicked the bed. "Whatever! Just be back down here in five minutes or so help me-"

"I get it!" Mordecai snapped angrily, barging past him to get to Rigby.

The other three walked out in silence, staring at their feet awkwardly.

"Rigby, get up, stop being such a big baby." Mordecai sighed, sitting down on the edge of the trampoline.

Rigby laystill under his pile of clothes and mouldering food, the slight muffle of tears audible from beneath it.

"Dude, what's your problem!?" Mordecai cried angrily, arms in the air. "You know I love Margaret, why can't you just be happy for me?"

Slowly, Rigby emerged from the pile. His eyes were puffy bloodshot, face red and streaked with tears and snot.

"You barely even speak to her. You didn't even go on one proper date together. How can you be getting married?" he spoke almost silently.

"Look Rigby, we've been getting a lot closer lately, we speak loads and have even kissed a couple of times. You just haven't noticed 'cus you've been spending so much time with Eileen. But one day when you were sick I went round to Margaret's and, well...I proposed."

Rigby stared up at Mordecai, face blank, eyes judgemental and disbelieving.

Mordecai rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly, not knowing what to say now.

"She's hot, okay? I've liked her for ages, you know that!"

Rigby leapt up and spat in Mordecai's face. Mordecai leapt back in disgust, rubbing his face furiously with the back of his wing.

"Dude! What the H?" Mordecai cried.

"Wow! She's hot! That means a hell of a lot to me now doesn't it! I And don't gimee all that Eileen crap! I don't even like her that much!" Rigby screamed.

"You said she was hot without her glasses on!" Mordecai argued back angrily.

"Well she doesn't ever take her glasses off does she!? And so what if I think she's hot, I think Margaret's hot too but it doesn't mean I planned to get down on one knee and propose to her!"

"Dude, don't say that about my finance!" Mordecai growled.

"Oooh, your 'fiance'! Getting all fancy now are we!? She's a slut, Mordecai! A hoar, a skank, whatever you wanna call her! Sure she's a nice enough girl, but she's had more men then you've had birthdays! _And_ she's younger than you!"

"You fucking jerk!" Mordecai cried, and swung out and punched Rigby right in the face.

Blood sprayed the walls and Rigby suddenly spat a tooth out at his feet. His entire face was now streaked red with blood and mucus.

"I'LL FUCKING KILL YOU!" Rigby cried, and before Mordecai knew what was happening Rigby was running at him with his baseball bat and swinging it at his crotch.

It was a straight hit, and Mordecai fell to the ground in a crippled heap, sweat dripping down his face. His eyes were forced shut and he suddenly vomited violently over himself, blood, mucus and more erupting from his beak.

"I'LL NEVER FORGIVE YOU MORDECAI!" Rigby screamed, before running from the room, a trail of blood streaking behind him...


	3. Chapter 3

_Two weeks later_

Rigby sat at the kitchen table alone, staring at his untouched bowl of cereal.

Suddenly, he heard the door creak open. He sighed and quickly picked up his spoon, sick of Benson and the others telling him he had to eat.

He stared down at the bowl in fake concentration, but suddenly looked up when he heard two unfamiliar female voices.

He gasped. At the door were two girls, one a tall, brown wolf with beady hazel eyes, wearing black skinny jeans, red baseball boots and a baggy indie band t-shirt. The other was a shorter orange fox with large, emerald eyes and bright pink cheeks. She was wearing a green tank top and skirt which showed off her flat stomach and pierced belly button, and she had nothing on her feet.

"Who the hell are you?" Rigby spat.

The wolf frowned but the fox only giggled. "Is that how you greet all ladies?" she said.

Her voice was high-pitched and squeaky, immediately annoying Rigby.

"You must be the weirdo Benson warned us about." the wolf spoke in a lower tone. She sounded nazilly, like she had a cold or something.

"Snark, shut up!" the fox nudged her friend embarrassedly.

"Snark? What a weird name." Rigby grunted.

"What's yours then?" Snark snapped back.

"Rigby. What's it to you?"

"Well seeing as we now work together, I guess quite a lot." Snark muttered.

"Wait, what!?" Rigby gasped, standing up. "You...you work here now?"

"Well done Einstein, give yourself a gold star for getting that one right. Benson said you did nothing at all and only let you keep your job out of pity. So me and Lex are here to replace you." Snark sneered.

"Excuse my friend." the fox said quickly. "Allow me to introduce myself. My name's Lexi, and this is my friend Sarah, but everyone calls her Snark. Your boss Benson said one of his workers quit, so he had to employ someone else. But you see, we come as a pair, Snark and me, so he was kind enough to give us both the job!"

"Ugh. Whatever." Rigby muttered, going back to staring at his cereal.

Just then, Muscleman walked in.

"Hey ladies." he said loudly, High Five Ghost following him in.

"Oh, hello there. You must be Mitch." Lexi said politly, putting her hand out for him to shake.

"His name's Muscleman." Snark said, and instead high-fived the two of them.

"Wait, do you know these guys or something?" Lexi frowned.

"Nope, but I heard Benson talking to them. Nobody calls him Mitch." Snark said proudly.

"Oh but Benson said-"

"Benson said this, Benson said that, blah blah blah who gives a crap?" Snark laughed meanly.

"You know who else doesn't give a crap?" Muscleman grinned.

"No, who?" Snark and Lexi both asked curiously.

"My M-"

"GAH! SHUT THE FUCK UP MUSCLEMAN!" Rigby interrupted suddenly, flinging his bowl of cereal away and scurrying from the room.

"Weir-do!" Snark said to Lexi, pretending to screw into her head.

"You said it sister, ever since his best bro Mordecai left to get married, he's been a nuthouse." Muscleman explained, and HFG nodded in agreement.

"Woah, his best friend ditched him to get married? Harsh." Snark breathed.

"That poor guy." Lexi whimpered.

"Yeah well, Mordecai's not all to blame, I guess." Muscleman sighed.

"What do you mean?" Lexi pressed.

"I mean, Mordecai did nothing wrong. He proposed to the girl of his dreams, she said yeah, Mordecai asked Rigby if he'd be the best man but he refused and kinda turned crazy. He hit Mordecai in the junk with a baseball bat and Mordecai had no choice but to leave. He'd of had to left at some point anyway to start a family, but I think everyone was shocked how fast he's just, well, disappeared from our lives I guess."

"Wow." was all Snark could say. "I kinda feel a bit bad now."

"Don't be, he'd always been a bit of an over-reactor to stuff anyway. He was bound not to take it lightly.

"Wait a minute...that racoon guy...was Rigby right?" Snark said suddenly.

Muscleman nodded. "Yeah, why?"

Snark turned to Lexi. "Oh God. He's the guy Benson said we had to share a room with."

Lexi's face turned pale.


	4. Chapter 4

_**Hey guys, so I know I haven't said anything before any of the other chapters, but I just felt like saying a few things now. Skip all this if you can't be bothered reading, it doesn't really make much difference to the story, so, whatever. So anyway, I noticed there is a lot, and I mean a LOT of fanfics where two females (usually animals) get employed at the park and either they, Mordecai and Rigby, or both, end up falling in love with each other, with a few minor plot details thrown in there for good measure. **_

_**But no, I kinda wanted to make my story a bit different. I know there's a lot of cussing, but I figured that Mordecai, Rigby and the others probably would talk like that if they got really angry, but seeing there's not really any canon episodes in which they would want or need to swear like that, it still does seem a bit weird to me, but oh well, I guess it gets their point across. And as for the whole 'Rigby is gay' thing, I hope I haven't offended anyone, especially anyone homosexual or bi, or just any senstive readers in general. I don't really wanna reveal any pairings in this yet, but keep your eyes peeled, trust me, it's gonna get interesting...**_

There was a quiet knock on the door. Rigby ignored it and lay unmoving on his trampoline.

Mordecai's bed had been empty for weeks now, but Rigby didn't dare sleep in it, weather it was either out of respect for Mordecai, or out of disrespect. Who'd want to sleep in a bed that jerk had been in? Well, that's what he thought anyway.

"Hello?" Lexi's quiet voice called in. "Rigby you in there?"

But suddenly the door was barged open by Snark and in walked the two mammals.

"What the heck? Why is there a trampoline in here?" Snark asked.

Rigby sat up angrily, glaring at the two. He then proceeded to start dragging his trampoline bed across the floor towards the door.

"Rigby, stop, what are you doing?" Lexi frowned.

"I'm sleeping in the bathroom. I ain't no pervert." he spat.

"Rigby, no, you don't need to do that!" Lexi gasped.

"Yeah Rigboner, just chill here with us!" Snark grinned

"_What_ did you call me?" Rigby snarled codly.

Lexi's face fell. "Ignore Snark, she was just kidding around, you know?"

"I don't secretly get a boner whenever I see you!" Rigby suddenly cried before sprinting out of the room.

"What did he just say?" Snark frowned, raising an eyebrow.

Lexi's cheeks burned crimson. "Uuuh...I dunno, but anyway, why's there only one bed in here?" she asked curiously.

"You don't think...you don't think Rigby and that other dude _shared_ a bed!?" Snark asked suddenly.

"No, they couldn't, I mean, that'd just be weird, wouldn't it?" Lexi said uncertainly.

"Oh my God! I _cannot_ believe this! Well, actually I can kinda. Rigby and that Mordecai guy were an item!" Snark burst out laughing, tears streaming down her face.

She fell to the bed and started rolling around.

"Shut up Snark!" Lexi snapped. "Rigby is _not _gay okay? I know he isn't!"

"Look Lex, face facts, it's so obviously true. Mordecai ran off with a woman to get married so his family would never find out he was gay. And so of course his ex boyfriend Rigby would be all upset and crazy!"

Lexi said nothing, she just stared stony-faced at her friend. But then a thought came to mind.

"Oh yeah? Well then why was he getting so embarrassed about sleeping in here and then going on about boners?" Lexi argued.

"Duh, he said he _didn't _get a boner when he was around us! He was telling the truth! He's trying to subtly hint to us he's gay!" Snark grinned.

"No no no! He's NOT gay okay!?" Lexi cried angrily.

"Sheesh, calm down Lex, what's your problem? Why're you getting so upset over this?"

"I-I'm not..." Lexi said quickly.

"Oooh! You've got a cru-ush!" Snark cried in a sing-song voice. "You've got the hots for homo!"

"Don't call him that!" Lexi snarled, hitting her friend suddenly.

"Lexi!" Snark gasped, bringing her hand to her face. "Why'd you do that?"

"'Cause you shouldn't call him names like that! No matter what his sexuality!"

"Where'd you learn this, a Sex Education pamphlet?" Snark mocked.

"So what if I like him, okay!? You hit on guys all the time!" Lexi argued.

"Lexi, you've known him, like, five minutes, and so far all he's been is a total jerk! Even Muscleman is more appealing!"

"Well if you like Mitch so much, why don't you go fuck him right now you bitch!" Lexi cried.

Snark burst out laughing at hearing Lexi swear. She very rarely did and it just sounded wrong when she tried to.

"Ugh!" Lexi cried, knowing she wasn't being taken seriously. "I swear I fucking hate you sometimes!" she screamed, and ran out the room in outrage.

It was only then that Snark realized something.

"Oooh." she said out loud. "I think Rigby _sleeps _on the trampoline."


	5. Chapter 5

Lexi burst out of the room but suddenly slammed into Rigby who was sitting outside the door silently, knees tucked under his chin. His eyes were shadowed in black, even more so than a normal racoon's, and Lexi wondered if he'd ever slept at all since his best friend had left him.

"Hey." Lexi said quietly, sliding down besides him.

Rigby said nothing, but scooched slightly further away from her. Lexi tried not to feel offended.

"I'm sorry if Snark or I offended you at all. Snark's just a bit quirky, you know? And I'm just the saddo who can barely say two words for herself.

Rigby turned to look at Lexi in a weird curiosity. She was pretty, in a childish sort of way, and she was about the exact height and weight as him too. He thought of Snark, the tall, gangly, know-it-all type, and he almost smiled. Snark and Lexi were like what he and Mordecai had once been.

"You fallen out with wolfy then?" Rigby said into the silence, not looking at Lexi's face.

Lexi chuckled. "You could say that, I suppose."

"Make up with her. Go to her now and apologise. No matter what either of you have done, just do it. Trust me, you'll regret it if you don't."

Lexi frowned and tilted her head slightly, shocked at Rigby's serious tone. "Don't you wanna know what we fell out over?" she asked nervously.

"I'm not the nosey type. Well, actually, that's a lie. I once was, but not now. Now I've realized the less you know, the hell of a lot better you feel."

"What if you'd known sooner about Mordecai's marriage? Would that not of made you feel better?" Lexi asked quietly.

Rigby stared angrily at the female fox, but his anger didn't last, he found that, somehow, he couldn't stay angry at her. Her innocent face made his insides go all fluffy.

"It's none of your business." he said finally, before standing up and walking away.

"Where're you going?" Lexi asked quickly, getting herself to her feet.

"To do my work. That's what I'm paid for, right?" Rigby gave her a weird sort of smile.

Lexi smiled back. A sincere, happy smile. "Right." she said back, before nodding at him and going back into the bedroom to apologise to her best ever friend.


	6. Chapter 6

"Rigby! What are you doing out here?" Benson snarled angrily upon seeing Rigby walking towards him in the park.

Rigby didn't see what Benson had to be angry about, but he put it down to the fact that the gumball machine was always angry.

"I came to see what work you had for me to do today." Rigby said calmly.

Benson looked taken aback, and rightly so, for the raccoon had barely left his room for the past two weeks and had said next to nothing to any of them.

But he smiled slightly and nodded happily. "Sure, okay. Well first off, you can start with cleaning out the fountain."

Rigby froze. His face turned pale and his eyes grew wide. The fountain. The place where everything had gone wrong. The last place he'd had a proper conversation with Mordecai.

He suddenly got on all fours and sprinted back to the house, tears streaming behind him.

"Rigby! Wait!" Benson cried in outrage, beginning to chase after him. "You can do something else if you want! Just please do something for God's sake!" he pleaded

Rigby skidded to a halt and turned around wearily.

Benson sighed a breath of relief. "Phew. I'm glad you stopped, I'm not as good as running in my old age." he said with a fake smile, trying to make Rigby laugh.

He failed.

"So...uum, anyway, you can take out the trash okay? Every trash can in the park needs emptied and re-bagged, do you think you're up to it? The girls can help out too if you want." Benson said awkwardly.

"NO!" Rigby cried.

"Oh, uuh, well then, how about the-"

"No! I meant, no, I don't need help from those chicks, I can do it alone, please Benson, just trust me!" Rigby said hopefully.

Benson sighed and rolled his eyes. "Okay, whatever, just get it done. And don't screw up! Or you're fired!"

Rigby held back a laugh as Benson turned to walk away. If he got a dollar for every time Benson said that, he'd be a billionaire. Not that he was complaining. Sure Benson might have serious anger management issues, and he could be a dick sometimes, he still somehow let him keep his job after everything bad he'd ever done since being employed here.

He smiled and looked around. It was a crisp, clear-skied day and the birds chirped happily in the trees, the frogs croaked merrily in the pond, but surprisingly the park was almost empty.

He guessed it must be a weekday, since Mordecai had left he hadn't really kept much track of the date or time.

He figured he need a watch. He cringed suddenly at the thought of a watch. Memories of his and Mordecai's song they'd sang to Skips rushed back to his mind. The day they sent him to the moon.

Rigby realized there was a lot of things that'd remind him of Mordecai. But he guessed he'd just have to man up and deal with it.

He started to bag up the first load of garbage from the trash can when he suddenly heard the squeal of breaks behind him. He sighed and turned around, expecting Muscleman and HFG to be sitting there in their golf cart, but instead, to his horror, it was Snark and Lexi.

"Hey Rigboner!" Snark grinned, leaping out of the cart. "Sweet ride, huh? Benson said it used to be yours and Rigby's, but it's ours now baby!" Snark said, patting the front of it fondly.

"Shut up Snark, Rigby can have it back if he wants." Lexi sighed.

"So." Rigby muttered at Lexi. "You guys made up?"

"Yeah." Lexi nodded happily. "I took your advice Rigs, thanks a lot." she clutched his hand fondly.

Rigby growled and snatched his arm away angrily. "Don't touch me!" he snapped.

"Sheesh, someone's in a good mood huh?" Snark sneered. "Anyway, Benson sent us to help you with the trash cans or whatever."

"That son of a bitch." Rigby muttered under his breath.

He'd specifically made it clear how he didn't want the two girls helping him. He mused over just bailing and going back to the house, but he didn't want to let Benson and Snark win. So he plastered a fake grin onto his face and went back to work.

"So, Rigboner, spill, you gay?" Lexi said, prodding him with the back of her foot.

Rigby span around at such a speed Lexi almost fell back in shock.

"No I am not gay. Who told you that?" he spat in rage.

He looked angry but inside his heart was beating faster and faster. He felt his cheeks burn red and his palms turned clammy so he could barely tie the nought in the bag.

"Oh, no one in particular, I just assumed-"

"You just assumed? Well here's an idea you dumb fat bitch, how about you get your fucking facts right before coming to me with your fucking nonsense rumours!" he cried, before running off as fast as he could, the bag slung over his shoulder, dripping mouldering juices as it slammed against his back continuously.

"Snark, why'd you have to be such a bitch and ruin everything all the time!" Lexi snarled at her friend.

"Oh shut up Lexi, I was only fooling and you know it. Besides, those who deny are always the true ones." she nodded proudly.

"Will you just drop the stupid gay thing!" Lexi snapped. "So what if he is, do you have to bring it up every chance you get? He's gonna hate us so much now!" she whined.

"And? Who cares? A load of people hate us anyway." Snark shrugged.

"You Snark! They hate_ you_! Not me, _you_! You might be used to being hated on by everyone but I'm not! You make me seem like an arrogant, selfish jerk all the time just because I'm friends with you! Why can't you just leave everyone alone!" Lexi cried.

Snark was now fuming with rage. "Oh shut your big mouth Lexi, you're suck a fucking drama queen. You've never had these big temper tantrums before, we've always been tighter than a fucking pig wedged between two whales but now you've suddenly started standing up for yourself? What happened to you always agreeing with me huh? You've changed since you got her Lex, for the worse. And it's all because of that fucking gay Raccoon."

"HE IS NOT GAY!" Lexi cried, and suddenly swung out at Snark, blood erupting from her nose at the blow.

"MAYBE HE'S NOT BUT YOU SURE AS HELL ARE!" Snark screamed, scratching at Lexi's face and drawing even more blood than before.

Lexi leapt at Snark's knees, dragging her to the ground so they were suddenly rolling about the grit in a violent fight.

"Girls! Girls! What the hell are you two doing!" Benson cried suddenly, charging towards them and ripping Lexi off of Snark.

"Let me go! I said _let me go_! I'm gonna fucking kill her!" Lexi cried, thrashing around wildly, tears and blood covering her body.

Snark took the opportunity to kick Lexi between her legs, causing her to suddenly throw up over herself in pain.

"GAAAAH!" she screamed, retching violently.

"YOU GIRLS BETTER STOP THIS RIGHT NOW OR YOU'RE BOTH FIRED!" Benson suddenly cried so loudly it seemed the whole park fell silent.

Birds flew from the trees and the small rodents scurried to safety.

Benson stood there panting, face redder than any red the girls had ever seen before, fists clenched, back arched, staring at the two.

"You two..." he gasped. "...get back to the house...right now...and don't think of leaving it until I say so...UNDERSTOOD!?"

The two girls said nothing, just nodded before scurrying off, leaving the abandoned golf cart for Benson to drive back.

"You can come out of that hedge now Rigby." Benson sighed without even turning.

Rigby gasped and leapt from the hedge suddenly. He'd been watching the whole thing, and boy had it been hot, and felt slightly embarrassed that Benson knew of his spying.

"Does this mean I-" Rigby started.

"Yes, Rigby, you can take the rest of the day off." Benson said weakly.

"Ah sweet!" Rigby grinned, before sprinting off his own way back to the house.


	7. Chapter 7

_**Hey, sorry this chapter is kinda short, anyway, points to whoever knows what the names Lexi and Snark mean. I chose them for their meanings. And yeah, you can look it up, I don't care. XD**_

Rigby finally got back to the house and pushed the door open and walked in. He went to flop down on the sofa when he suddenly caught sight of himself in the reflection of the television. He was stained with garbage and leaves from the hedge, as well as some mud and feathers for good measure. He sighed in annoyance. He guessed he'd have to take a shower.

He stumbled up the stairs and pushed the door to the bathroom open without even thinking. He heard a scream. He screamed. He tried to back away but he slipped on the wet tiles and skidded backwards and smashed his head against the wall, eyes flying open in pain.

"You pervert!" he heard Snark scream, clutching the shower curtain around her body.

Rigby's face burned red but he somehow couldn't drag his face away from Snark's body. She was certainly top-heavy, and curvy in all the right places. But he felt so weird seeing her like this. He tore his eyes away suddenly.

"GET OUT!" Snark snarled, throwing a wet sponge at him in rage.

Rigby clutched the sponge and looked at it, wondering why she'd thrown it. He looked back up at her for answers.

"Oh for God's sake." Snark snapped, switching the shower off and stepping out.

Rigby's eyes just about burst out of their sockets, but before his mind had any chance to process what was happening, Snark had a towel around herself.

"Look. I have something I need to say to you." Snark sighed, sitting down on the lid of the toilet.

She patted the side of the bath for Rigby to sit on. Confused, he did so.

She took a deep breath. "Look. I...I'm sorry for calling you gay, okay? I was just foolin' around, and honestly, if I had the choice, I wouldn't be sitting her half-naked in the bathroom telling you this, but for Lexi's sake, I needed to apologise. I hope you can forgive me..." she muttered.

She shuddered slightly at how soppy and wet she'd just sounded, but she knew she needed to do it. Not for her, not for Rigby, but for Lexi. Her best friend ever.

She caught sight of herself in the mirror. She had a black eye, a burst lip, and scratches all over her body. The old Lexi would rather of died than do this to her. Snark realized how much, for some reason, Lexi liked Rigby. She couldn't ruin it for her. Not so soon.

Rigby looked at Snark with a new sort of respect. "It's okay." he shrugged casually. "Sorry 'bout walking in on you like this." he said awkwardly.

"S'okay." Snark almost laughed. "The length of time you were staring at me kinda convinced me you weren't gay. Well, not as gay as I thought you were. I mean-"

"Look, Snark, just shut up." Rigby said. "You talk a lot of crap, you know that?" he smiled.

Snark nodded. "Oh I know alright." she grinned. "But that's why everyone loves me."


	8. Chapter 8

Rigby and Snark sat in silence for some while before finally Snark broke it.

"So..." she said quietly. "Shouldn't you be going?"

Rigby frowned, but then suddenly looked alarmed. "Oh! Uh, yeah, yeah, sure!" he said quickly, rushing towards the door.

"No wait!" Snark suddenly shouted.

Rigby turned around, raising an eyebrow. "Yes..?" he muttered.

Snark took a deep breath. "Look. Lexi's my best friend. And she likes you, I guess. Weird, I know. But anyway, just to make sure you're one hundred percent not gay...I've gotta kiss you. It's the only way I'll know for certain.

Rigby's eyes grew wide. "K-k-kiss me?" he gasped in shock.

Snark rolled her eyes impatiently. "Yes, okay? Have you ever kissed a girl before?"

Rigby shook his head embarrassedly.

"Oh." Snark said. "Have you ever, uum...kissed a, you know...boy?" she asked nervously.

Rigby gasped. "No! Of course not!" he cried. "I've never kissed anyone before in all my life. Not even my family." she shrugged.

"Oh, I see." Snark said weakly. "Well then. Come here."

Rigby frowned slightly. The he suddenly realized. "O-oh!" he muttered, leaning in slightly.

As his lips touched Snark's, he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He'd never kissed anyone before, but she seemed a bit of an expert. Her lips were soft and warm, breath sweet like bubblegum, and the way she seemed to move in rhythm to the kiss made him need to pull back and utter two words.

"Oh Mordecai..." he moaned.

Snark leapt back suddenly.

"WHAT!?" she cried, face burning red.

Rigby leapt into the air in shock. "Oh! N-no, I-I did-didn't mean it like that I-I..."

"You gay little pervert!" Snark spat, fuming with rage. "You kiss a girl and cry out a _BOYS_ name!? How-how could you ever think that's acceptable!" she screamed.

"You-you said it was only a test!" Rigby whimpered.

"Yeah, a test that you failed! You're a gay little liar and now I'm gonna tell-" Snark suddenly stopped.

"What? You're gonna tell Lexi I'm gay? Even though I'm not and it'll only break her heart if you do?" Rigby snarled.

Snark froze, eyes clouded in confusion. "I-I guess...I-I don't know..."

"Look." Rigby snapped. "The last fifteen minutes didn't happen. Okay?" he proposed.

Snark growled in anger. "Fine! Whatever!" she spat, backing away from him. "Just remember, midget-you've got an enemy for life now!"


	9. Chapter 9

That night, Benson had ordered in pizza to celebrate the girls survival of the first day of their new job. Lexi and Snark hadn't been too sure if he'd been joking or not about the whole 'survival' thing, but Skips told them he'd been serious.

It was only Lexi, Snark and Rigby sitting eating it however. Pops had retired to his bedroom claiming to be tired, but his Harpsichord playing could still be heard from upstairs. Skips claimed he had to go work out, Muscle Man and High Five Ghost had just grabbed a box of pizza and gone back to their caravan, and Benson by this point was back at his apartment, leaving only the three of them sitting in an awkward silence together.

"So Snark, it looks like we sure did survive our first day of work, huh?" Lexi said cheerfully to her friend.

"Yeah, I gotta admit you're right." Snark smiled slightly. "Even if we did go through a few rough patches." she laughed.

"Wait...so...you guys made up then?" Rigby asked.

"Uuum, yeah, I told you remember?" Lexi said confusedly.

Rigby shook his head. "No, no, I mean the big fight outside."

Lexi frowned. "Uuum...how did you know about that?"

Rigby froze. _Oh shit_, he thought.

"I...uuh...saw Snark's cuts and bruises, y'know?" he said quickly.

He then mentally facepalmed.

"Uuum...when?" Lexi asked, brows furrowed in confusuion.

"He..uh...my face! Yeah, he, uh, saw my face!" Snark intervened quickly.

"Snark, there's barely a mark on your face, just tell me what's going on now!" Lexi growled, knowing she's been betrayed somehow.

"No Snark! You CAN'T tell her!" Rigby hissed, eyes staring into Snark's.

"Look, I'll tell you okay!" Snark cried, tears brimming in her eyes.

"No! Snark I swear to God you better not tell!" Rigby cried.

"I've got to, okay!?" Snark wept. "Lexi's my friend, she's got to know!"

Snark took a deep breath. "Me and Rigby ki-"

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.

"Who could that be?" Snark frowned, walking to the door nervously.

"Maybe it's Benson?" Lexi suggested, forgetting her anger momentierily.

Suddenly, in walked a tall, slim, extremely beautiful female robin. She was wearing tight, dark-blue pants and an equally tight-fitting black t shirt, with black high heels on her feet. She smiled bravely at the three.

"Wait a minute...are you...Mordecai!?" Snark exclaimed, mouth wide open in shock.

Margaret brought a wing to her mouth and giggled. "No, not quite, but I _am_ Mordecai's finance." she laughed.

The two girls noticed the shining silver ring placed upon one of her fingers and nodded as they slowly understood the situation.

"Woah." Snark gasped, feeling the immediate tension.

"Why are you here?" Lexi frowned, looking worriedly at Rigby who was currently standing frozen in front of them.

"Look, I didn't come here to cause trouble, in fact, I came here to do anything but. Rigby, can we talk somewhere more private please?" Margaret said soothingly, eyes filled with pity.

"No!" Rigby spat angrily. "If you've got something to say to me, you can say it in front of thse two!" he snarled.

Margaret shook her head sadly and sighed. "Okay." she shrugged. "It doesn't bother me, I suggested it for your own sake."

"Since when have you giving a fuck about me?" Rigby said shakily, feeling the tears brim in his eyes. He rubbed at them furiously with his knuckles.

"Rigby!" Margaret gasped, shocked at his sudden turn. "I'm your friend! Me, Mordecai, Eileen. We all miss you. We don't want it to be this way Rigby. Mordecai's heartbroken, we all are. We want you to be the best man, Eileen's gonna be bridesmaid."

"What, and are all your exes gonna be in audience? Gee, you'll need a whole fucking circus tent to fit all them in!" Rigby snapped cruelly.

Lexi and Snark sat there in shock silence, eyes wide with concern. They badly wanted to watch the drama unfold but also felt like they should do something to fix the situation.

Margaret stepped back like she'd just been slapped in the face. "How-how can you say that to me? I'm your best friends wife-to-be!" Margaret cried, tears falling down her face.

"He's not my fucking best friend you ugly skank!" Rigby screamed, face red in rage. "Maybe he once was but it's clear I mean nothing to him now!"

"Rigby, you mean the world to Mordecai! He wants you to be best man for goodness sakes, despite everything bad you've ever done to him! He's always had your back through thick and thin and stood back and let you have all your pretend glory, and now the one time something good happens in his life you act like _your_ the one getting hurt!? Typical Rigby, that's what I say!" Margaret spat angrily, tears still falling.

"Don't talk to Rigby like that!" Lexi growled suddenly, standing up.

"Lexi, stay out of it!" Snark whispered, grabbing her to pull her back,

"No, Rigby's our friend and we can't just sit back and let him get abused like this!" Lexi cried.

"Oh, _I'm_ the one dishing out abuse? And who are you two exactly? A fat, over-grown ginger squirrel and a greasy, lanky emo dog!? Gimee a break!" Margaret snapped.

"That's it!" Snark snarled, and before anyone knew what had happened, Margaret was on the floor, stone cold knocked out, and Snark was standing over her with bloody knuckles.

"Bitch!" she muttered, spitting on the unconscious body.

Rigby and Lexi looked at each other in horror, but neither of them could say anything.


	10. Chapter 10

Suddenly, there was another fast, frantic knock on the door.

Everyone froze.

"Oh shit!" Rigby cried. "It'll be Benson!"

"Oh no!" Lexi whimpered. "He'll kill us!"

"Damn right he will, he'll kill us for killing Margaret!" Rigby growled.

"Shut up midget!" Snark snapped. "I didn't kill her okay!? I...I hope..."

"Uh, one second Benson, just coming!" Lexi cried, rushing over to the door and leaning against it to stop Benson opening it.

"Benson? What? It's me, Mordecai." a male voice said confusedly.

"The fuck?" Snark said, walking over to open it. "So _you're_ Mordecai then?"

"Yeah, and if you don't mind me asking, who are you?" Mordecai started, walking in, but froze when he saw his finance laying stone cold in the middle of the floor. "DUDE WHAT THE FUCK!?" he cried, running over to Margaret's unconscious body.

"Oh crap oh crap oh crap!" Lexi cried, flailing about in a panic. "Snark why on earth did you let him in?"

"I-I dunno I just didn't think!" Snark whined, face pale in fear. "Look Mordo, I didn't mean to knock-out your finance you know, just cause some permanent facial disfigurement!" she pleaded.

Mordecai shook his head angrily, feeling Margaret's pulse. He dragged her up onto the sofa and set her down.

"You guys are lucky she's okay, she should wake up soon enough. But you!" he cried, pointing at Rigby. "Dude what the H? Why did you let this happen?"

Rigby said nothing, he just remained standing there shaking in shock, hurt and confusion.

"M-Mordecai..." he managed to utter. "W-what are you doing here?"

Mordecai sighed. "Rigby, you're my best friend, my bro, and you always will be, but I understand you needed your space right now so I didn't plan to come-"

"Oh yeah, that's right, get your girlfriend to do your dirty work for you!" Snark spat.

"Jesus will you let me finish!?" Mordecai snapped. "I didn't wanna uspet you Rigby, so Margaret said she'd come and try and talk some sense into you. But she'd been away ages so I decided I had to come and check she was alright. And it's a good thing I did because look at her now!"

"She's gonna be alright you said so yourself!" Lexi growled.

"That's not the point! She still shouldn't be like that!" Mordecai snapped. But then he sighed. "Look, it's alright, I'm not angry, just...a little pissed off I guess. Rigby, listen, you gotta just tell me straight out, why don't you wanna come to my own wedding dude?"

Rigby said nothing for a short while, but finally, he spoke.

"Because I hate you." he hissed.

"Yeah but why? I didn't do anything to upset you that day, in fact, I was acting extra nice around you 'cus I knew you'd be jealous!"

"Jealous? You think I'm jealous of that...that thing over there?" Rigby spat, staring at Margaret in disgust.

"Shut up dude!" Mordecai growled. "And no, I meant the wedding itself. Just because I found love and happiness and you'll probably never find any of those things because your too lazy and naïve to act in any way responsible or mature! You're just a dick all the time and people are starting to get annoyed. But I can never stay mad at you Rigby, no matter how much I wanna, so hows about we just put this whole thing behind us and move on with our lives? Huh?" he put out his wing for Rigby to shake.

Rigby stared at Mordecai's wing like it was something repulsive that should be killed with fire.

"Fuck you Mordecai. Fuck you and everyone that goes to your fucking wedding!" he spat.

Mordecai leapt back in shock like he'd just been bitten by a rabid dog.

He shook his head sadly and sighed. He looked over at the two girls, standing there holding hands like a bunch of naughty school kids scared of being told off. He gave them a pitying look before turning back to Rigby.

"Look dude, I didn't wanna have to say this to you, I thought you'd of changed, but since you clearly haven't, I'll just say it. If you won't be our best man then we'll just have to ask Don to be it. He's the closet thing I'll get to you."

Lexi frowned in confusion at Rigby's reaction to this. He looked angry, upset, back stabbed and heartbroken all at the same time, as if he'd just been told he was gonna be killed, stuffed and s hung up on the wall of Mordecai and Margaret's new house. Honestly.

"Wait a minute? Who's Don?" she asked quietly.

Mordecai turned around sharply at these words. "He's Rigby's brother that he hates." Mordecai said casually.

"Ouch. Burn!" Snark said, grinning, but everyone else ignored her. She slunk away embarrassedly.

"He won't do it!" Rigby snarled. "Don pratically worships me. If I tell him not to do it, he won't. He's my brother, he can't go against me like that!"

"What, like you never go against him? He knows how much you hate him and maybe he'll just grow up and stop acting like your own personal slave and do what he wants for once!" Mordecai growled. "But even if he doesn't, Benson or Pops or whatever will do it. They'll be more than willing." he shrugged casualty.

"Whatever!" Rigby snapped. "They don't even like you any more! They all said so, subtly or not! Benson replaced you the second you left, with not just one but two new people!"

"Yeah, so? It just shows I did the work of two people constantly because you did fuck all!"

"Whatever, it's not like I give a fuck, just gather up your skanky girlfriend and get lost!"

"I SAID don't talk about her like that!" Mordecai snarled through gritted teeth.

"Like what?" Rigby said innocently. "Like this? SKANK! BITCH! HOAR! PROSTITUE! SLA-"

"YOU SHUT YOUR MOUTH YOU SON OF A BITCH!" Mordecai roared before leaping for Rigby and throwing him to the floor before punching him violently in the face.

"Rigby!" Lexi screamed, running to help him.

"STAY OUT OF THIS!" Mordecai growled, shoving Lexi backwards so she stumbled and fell.

"You mother fucker!" Snark gasped, charging over to Mordecai and smashing a lamp over his head without thinking.

"GAAAH!" Mordecai groaned, falling backwards in pain.

"Snark!" Lexi gasped. "You can't do that to people!"

"He fucking hit you Lexi! How can I stand by and let him do that! Look you're bruising already!"

"Get off me!" Lexi spat. "I'm not a baby okay!? I can fight my own battles!" she tried to say bravely, but tears were already forming in her eyes.

"No you fucking can't you cunt! Look you're already bawling like a baby already!"

"Can't you two just shut the hell up for two seconds!?" Mordecai cried, wincing in pain.

"STOP TAAAAAAAAAAAAAALKING!" Rigby screamed suddenly, and everyone fell silent.

All that could be heard was panting coming from the four of them.

Mordecai got shakily to his feet, rubbing himself down angrily.

"Whatever! You guys are a bunch of physcos!" Mordecai growled, walking to the couch to get Margaret.

"There wasn't a problem until you got here!" Snark argued.

Actually, there had been, Lexi thought to herself, but saying that wouldn't of really helped the situation.

"Well thanks for letting me know, right after knocking out my girlfriend and smashing the back of my head with a fucking lamp!" Mordecai spat.

Mordecai reached for the doorhandle when suddenly, the door flew open.

"WHAT THE HECK IS GOING ON HERE!?" Benson cried, storming in. "ALL I CAN HEAR IS-"

He froze. He looked at the scene in front of him. Lexi was curled up in a ball on the floor, sobbing her eyes out, Snark was red in the face, panting for breath, a broken lamp clutched in her hand. Rigby was standing on the table shaking, two black eyes and several teeth missing, and in front of him was Mordecai, the back of his head smashed and bleeding heavily, and what looked like a dead Margaret in his arms.

Benson wanted to close the door, walk right out and pretend like he hadn't seen any of this. But he had, and he knew if he didn't do something about it he'd be haunted by the memory for the rest of his life. So he began speaking, clamly, clearly, slowly as to get everyone's attention.

"Snark, put that lamp down." he ordered.

Snark stood there, staring in silence for some time before his words finally got through to her and she dropped the lamp so it cracked to pieces on the floor.

"Good girl. Now take Lexi upstairs and calm her down. Rigby, go to the bathroom and clean yourself up, then go to the kitchen and get some ice for your eyes. Skips should be able to put those teeth back in for you. Mordecai, go to hospital. Now. Here's the keys to the cart if you think you can drive." he tossed Mordecai the keys which Mordecai failed to catch, but he bent down shortly after and retrieved them.

"Thanks Benson..." Mordecai said weakly, stumbling to the door.

"Wait!" Benson said sharply. Mordecai turned around wearily. "Listen." Benson sighed. "I don't know why you're here or what happened, but maybe it's best if you just don't come back here again, not until everything calms down a little, y'know? We'll still always be your family and always be here for you with love, care and support, but I guess over time some things change. I'm sorry things have turned out this way."

"It's okay Benson. It's not your fault. But it's not mine either, so I'm not gonna keep pretending like it is. Rigby has a problem, a big one, and until he gets it sorted out I don't think you should let him keep working here."

Rigby froze. He'd been on his way up the stairs and these words had caught his ears. This job was all he had. He had a home, he had company, he got a decent pay and good food. If he was fired, he knew he'd be dead within a week.

Benson stared Mordecai in the eye. "How about you don't tell me how to do my job, and seeing as you no longer work here, I won't tell you how to do yours. You got that?" he growled.

Mordecai put his arms up in surrender. "Whatever Benson, I'm just warning you." he muttered, before walking out with Margaret over his shoulder.

Rigby smiled to himself.

"Y'know, eavesdropping is considered pretty rude by some people." Benson said to Rigby without even turning around.

"Oh, uh...sorry.." Rigby mumbled, before sprinting up the stairs.

He ran into his room to grab a towel but what he saw next made him stop stone cold in his tracks.

He thought he was going to be sick.


	11. Chapter 11

**Hey guys! It's me, back from the dead! So all I can really say is SORRY for not updating this, I was working on a tone of other stories as well as having school to deal with, so anyway, this may come as a surprise to you but I planned to make this the final chapter. At least for now anyway. But! If people want this to continue and see how their lives continue on from here, feel free to let me know, I'll be more than willing to make a chapter 12! So thanks for reading guys, bye for now!**

Rigby stared at what was in front of him, speechless and motionless.

Snark and Lexi were sitting on the bed kissing passionately, arms entwined in each other's, eyes closed.

Rigby's eyes grew wide and he took a step back, unable to process the scene in front of him.

"W-wh...what's...what's going on...?" he managed to stutter, but the two seemed unable to hear him over their sobering.

But then Snark opened her eyes, and though at first she kept them on Lexi, one then strayed to the side and she leapt back so fast it was as if she'd been kissing hot coal.

"Rigby!" was all she could say, as she pressed her back up against the wall in shock, panting for breath, eyes wide in fear.

"Snark? What is it..." Lexi turned around suddenly and had pretty much the same reaction.

"Rigby! I...uh...this-this isn't what it...I mean...you see...uh..." she started, face burning crimson and tears beginning to form in her eyes.

"So." Rigby said icely, a small smile forming on his repulsed face. His eyes formed slits. "This is it, huh? You call me gay more times then I can remember, accuse me of being some perverted homo after kissing me, when all along, you two are the only queers in this house!" he snarled, fuming with rage.

"Rigby..." Lexi wept, breathing heavily with nerves. "It...it's not what you think...we were just...uum..."

"Experimenting." Snark managed to bark, grabbing Lexi paw and holding it tight/

"Oh, is that so. You know what..." Rigby sighed and slunk down on the floor, realizing he himself was also pretty exhausted. He closed his eyes and shook his head sadly. "Why are you so ashamed?" he said simply. "You really think I'd care? And then what? Go tell Muscleman? Benson? Pops? You really think they'd actually care? Sure, maybe they'd be a bit surprised but hey, enough freaky shit happens here to make it forgettable in under a week, under a day!"

Lexi and Snark looked at each other in confusion, not entirely sure where he was getting at.

"I don't judge people. Not now anyway. I don't do much now to be honest, but hey, that's my choice, as it is yours to be...well, whatever you wanna call yourselves. But trying to hide it with false accusations that I was gay? Saying Lexi had a crush on me? Jesus you really know how to keep a secret huh? Like all those things weren't so obviously gonna lead up to you two being gay yourselves. I honestly, couldn't be less shocked."

"So wait..." Snark started, rubbing at her eyes and nose before sitting up and looking down at Rigby. "You knew...all this time?"

Rigby smiled and nodded his head weakly, tired of the whole charade already.

"B-but how...?" Lexi frowned, tears still threatening to fall from her face.

"That time. The time you came and sat next to me and I told you to make up with Snark. The whole time I was thinking, you and Snark? You're just like me and Mordecai used to be. Exactly. And...well..."

Snark's mouth formed a grin. Her eyes grew wide in expectation, knowing what was coming next. "You aren't!" Snark gasped, but she knew the answer.

Rigby sighed and turned away, feeling his whole face burn into redness. He nodded. One nod, was all it took.

"You and Mordecai...were an item?" Lexi breathed, eyes now wide in awe.

"No. Not quite. Let's just say he didn't feel the same way about me...but, he knew how I felt alright, that's for certain. Which is why he left to get married. He didn't want things to escelate further he was...scared, I guess. Scared I would rub off on him, turn him 'gay.'"

"And...and he said this all to you?" Snark asked.

"Oh no, not to my face of course. _That'd_ be too much effort. But the day he left, he sent me an email. Nobody else knows. They all think I'm to blame. Which hey, maybe I am."

"N-no, of-of course you're not to blame!" Lexi cried, running over and helping Rigby up. "What Mordecai did, that was cowardly. Who knows, maybe he did have feelings for you but just wasn't willing to express them."

"But he's gone now Rigby." Snark continued. "And you need to just move on. Man up and get yourself back out there! Well...not quite like that, but I mean, at least help out on the park? Me and Lex are up to our knees in work at the moment!" she pleaded.

"Snark!" Lexi gasped, punching her in the shoulder.

Rigby just laughed. "No, no, it's fine. In fact, it's been what I've needed to hear all week!" he grinned, standing up and shaking himself off.

"We're sorry for lying to you Rigby. But I honestly did have some kind of feelings for you. Maybe not romantic ones, but frienship ones!" she smiled.

"You nutcase." Snark laughed. "Friendship feelings? I swear sometimes I wonder just what the heck you talk about Lex. But seriously Rigby, I'm sorry too. I was a jerk to you, to everyone. A total asshole. And maybe Lex, maybe your bi. Maybe I've been pushing you too hard to be my girlfriend and not letting you find a boyfriend."

Suddenly, there was a sound of a door opening. The bathroom door. Someone had been in it the whole time.

All three animals looked at each other in shock. It was Benson.

"B-Benson?" Lexi squeaked.

"You...you heard that whole thing, didn't you?" Snark looked down in embarrassment.

"Yup, I did, but I think I might just forget about it." he almost smiled.

"You know Benson, eavesdropping is considered rude by some people." Rigby said to Benson, smiling, and the two just laughed whilst Lexi and Snark stared at them in confusion.

"Well I happened to think it was a lovely speech!" a voice suddenly spoke. Pops.

"Pops! What!? You heard it all too?" Rigby gasped. He hadn't noticed the harpsichord had stopped playing a while back.

"I also happened to of heard it." a gruff voice suddenly spoke. Climbing through the window was Skips.

"Huh? What the hell?" Snark wrinkled her nose in confusion.

"I was exercising outside and couldn't help but listen in. I then climbed through the window. It's good training let me tell you."

Suddenly, Rigby's phone flashed red, signalling a text message.

"Oh, who'll this be, Muscleman and Hive Five Ghost texting to say they heard it too?" Rigby rolled his eyes and laughed, but froze when he saw who the message was from. Mordecai.

_Sorry _

That was all it said. Rigby smiled and pressed delete. Maybe one day, he'd reply to that message. But not today. Not when he didn't need to.


	12. Chapter 12

It was the day before the wedding.

Benson, Skips, Pops, Muscleman and High Five Ghost were stood at the door in their tuxedos, waiting for the taxi to come and pick them up.

The wedding was happening out of town, Margaret wanted it to be close to where she grew up, as well as near her family, so the group were leaving a day early to get there on time.

"And you're sure you three will be alright watching the place whilst we're away?" Benson asked sternly, reluctantly dropping the keys into Snark's waiting hand.

"Oh pu-_lease_ Benson, don't be so silly! We'll be fine!" Snark grinned, though she turned back and slyly winked at Lexi, who proceeded to giggle excitedly.

"No wild house parties! No fireworks, explosions, time travel, warp speed, parallel universes, cursed arcade games or anything of the like, you got that?" Benson snapped.

Snark and Lexi turned to each other and wrinkled their noses in confusion. "Say what?" Snark frowned, raising an eyebrow.

"You'd be surprised."Skips muttered, looking over towards Rigby, who was stood awkwardly in the background, one arm behind his back.

Truth be told, Rigby had actually changed a lot in the past two weeks, and defiantly for the better. The once selfish, shallow, spiteful side of him was gone and in it's placed was a kind, caring, mature and responsible nature, which suited him surprisingly well. Sure he still knew how to have fun and have a laugh with the others, but at the same time he could be trusted, which pleased Benson more than he let on.

Snark and Lexi had, in some ways, took on the role of the old Mordecai and Rigby, if not a bit more girlier and slightly less crazy. Their friendship was still as strong as ever, but their status as girlfriend and girlfriend was kinda on hold for now.

"Romance is stupid. Me and Lex are friends, we don't need any dumb old signs of 'public affection' to tell others that!" Snark had stated proudly one day.

Lexi had just shrugged and smiled, who knew what went on in that girls mind?

Rigby had slowly began to realized he had changed, and in a way he believed he knew why. He knew the old Rigby would never be missed. If he'd died, ran away, finally actually been fired, no one would be sad, upset, or miss his presence. Mordecai on the other hand? The death of him could no doubt lead someone to suicide damn that lovable blue avian, so Rigby knew he had to somehow mould himself into a new version of Mordecai, a shorter, furrier, raccoon version of him. Call it crazy, but Rigby had almost...made up for his loss of Mordecai by, well...becoming Mordecai. If that made any sense.

"C'mon guys let's beat this popsicle stand, don't forget it's the bachelor party tonight! WOOOOOH!" Muscle Man cried, tearing his shirt off and swinging it above his head.

"Muscleman! Get your shirt back on right now!" Benson growled, face burning red with anger.

"You know who _else _should get her shirt back on right now? MY MOM!" Muscle Man grinned, gaining a high-five from HFG.

"Ugh, I don't have time for this, c'mon guys let's go." Benson face-palmed, walking out to the porch.

"Ta-ta!" Pops sung, skipping outside happily.

"See you three tomorrow." Skips nodded.

"Later losers." Muscleman spat, waddling outside with HFG closely following.

"And remember..." Benson started, seating himself in the taxi. "NO PARTIES!" he screamed, before the door slammed in his face and the taxi sped off into the distance.

"Pah. Is he for real!?" Snark scoffed, turning to her two friends. "Who does he think he is? The sheer thought of us throwing a party in this massive, spacious house in the centre of town when there's absolutely no chance of Benson or the others finding out is simply..."

"Preposterous?" Lexi suggested.

"No! I was gonna say...AWESOME!" Snark cried, punching the air.

Rigby sighed. "I'll order the pizzas..."


End file.
